It could happen to you. Stand up for what’s right. #p2
“Free will is not totally free. It is radically constrained by the frames and metaphors shaping your brain and limiting how you see the world. Those frames get there, to a remarkable extent, through repetition in the media.”
—George Lakoff
TURN OFF THE TV AND READ. I recommend Whose Freedom?: The Battle Over America’s Most Important Ideas by George Lakoff.
It has been almost a year since I wrote this but my feelings remain unchanged.
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I hate the system that makes it easy for men to ignore sexism, whites to ignore racism and heterosexuals to deny people equal rights.
I hate all of the distractions that make the aforementioned ignorance possible.
I hate the system that creates vast amounts of wealth and poverty.
I hate the system that perpetuates war for every other reason except humanity.
I hate the system that allows scholars to study inequality but then almost requires that they do nothing about it.
I hate the system that doesn’t provide an adequate education to most of its population.
I hate the system that lets people call other people “lazy” even though they know absolutely nothing about them.
I hate the system that allows people to twist the brilliant words of Dr. Martin Luther King to serve their own purpose.
I hate the system that creates hierarchies based on race, gender, class and sexual orientation.
I hate the system that allows inequality to be reproduced day in and day out.
I hate the system that allows privilege to be ignored and oppression to be achieved.
I hate the system because it is all around us yet most of us don’t even see it.
I hate the system because it saps my strength and weakens my resolve.
And most of all, I hate the system because it sometimes makes me hate the people.
I’d like to add that hegemonic masculinity not only impacts the lives of men, but also the lives of women.
See how little individuals need the government or each other in our pursuit of happiness!
Young professionals move around so many times, usually for school and then work, that they rarely develop a strong sense of community. Friends are spread out all over the country (or even world). This has led to both superficial relationships (via facebook, twitter, etc) and increasing amounts of depression among young adults. There is just something magical and irreplaceable about spending quality time with people you love. My critique lies with the capitalist system that has forced this upon us rather than the ways we cope with the damage it has caused. Yes, fb and twitter are better than nothing, but it cannot and will never be the same as having real meaningful interaction.
The spontaneity of conversations has been lost as well as the subtle non-verbal cues that mean so much. When two (or three or five or ten) people are together - laughing, talking, crying, being silent, or just in each other’s presence - there is something magical created. Over years of spending time together that connection helps to shape and define our communities, which leads to a sense of responsibility for each other (and our fellow citizens). But, when that interaction is missing or long distant, a person can have hundreds upon hundreds of facebook friends but still actually be alone and lonely. There is also a lack of physical contact that goes unacknowledged. I argue that if we spend most of our time interacting with our friends via a computer instead of being out in the community with them it affects not only the quality of our relationships but also our own health and happiness. Relationships cannot mature and be nurtured over a computer. You cannot hear a person’s voice or see them interact with others. You cannot sense when your friends are feeling down or dejected unless they tell you. You cannot hug them or touch them or share food with them - all of which are tremendously important in building and maintaining connections with people. It is the minutiae of everyday life that matters, and it is a very intimate experience that cannot be replaced. A person creates a family through those interactions – a family of choice.
My favorite quotes:
“I am convinced that if we are to get on the right side of the world revolution, we as a nation must undergo a radical revolution of values. We must rapidly begin the shift from a “thing-oriented” society to a “person-oriented” society. When machines and computers, profit motives and property rights are considered more important than people, the giant triplets of racism, materialism, and militarism are incapable of being conquered.”
“America, the richest and most powerful nation in the world, can well lead the way in this revolution of values. There is nothing, except a tragic death wish, to prevent us from reordering our priorities, so that the pursuit of peace will take precedence over the pursuit of war. There is nothing to keep us from molding a recalcitrant status quo with bruised hands until we have fashioned it into a brotherhood.”
“A nation that continues year after year to spend more money on military defense than on programs of social uplift is approaching spiritual death.”
“Many of the ugly pages of American history have been obscured and forgotten. A society is always eager to cover misdeeds with a cloak of forgetfulness, but no society can fully repress an ugly past when the ravages persist into the present. America owes a debt of justice, which it has only begun to pay. If it loses the will to finish or slackens in its determination, history will recall its crimes and the country that would be great will lack the most indispensable element of greatness — justice.”
“We will have to repent in this generation not merely for the vitriolic words and actions of the bad people, but for the appalling silence of the good people.”
“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that. Hate multiplies hate, violence multiplies violence and toughness multiplies toughness in a descending spiral of destruction. The chain reaction of evil – hate begetting hate, wars producing more wars – must be broken or we shall be plunged into the darkness of annihilation.”
—MLK
I don’t love the rebel.
I don’t lust after the bad boy.
I don’t want to be with the tough guy.
I love sweet men.
I love kind men, generous men, thoughtful men.
Murder.
Rape.
Abuse.
Greed.
Lust.
Privilege.
Racism.
Sexism.
Homophobia.
With so many men at the heart of darkness,
I need constant reminders that the good guys exist.
That there are sweet guys.
Magnanimous, caring men.
Pro-Feminist men.
Anti-racist men.
Men who don’t fear anyone’s sexuality.
I couldn’t keep fighting the good fight if they didn’t exist.
It helps to remind me what I’m fighting for.
Progressives MUST start talking about their values. Here’s an example.
FAMILY VALUES: Family values are extremely important particularly concerning the raising of children. Children must grow up in strong, supportive, loving homes. Children become responsible, self-disciplined and self-reliant through being cared for, respected, and caring for others both in their family and community. The obedience of children comes out of their love and respect for their parents and their community, NOT our of fear of punishment. Good communication is crucial. If their authority is to be legitimate, parents and other adults must explain why their decisions serve the cause of protection and nurturance. The principal goal of nurturance is for children to be fulfilled and happy in their lives. This nurturance can and should come from multiple sources. Mothers, fathers, grandparents, extended family, neighbors, and/or friends should all play a role in raising children. The configuration of adults (and their sexual orientation) plays absolutely no role in a child’s healthy development - respect, nurturance, love, communication and protection does.
We must start talking about our values and stop talking about issues. It’s not that issues aren’t important, but VALUES must come first. What do environmental protection, civil rights, abortion rights, gun control, gay rights and public education all have in common??
THE ETHIC OF CARING!! Empathy, Responsibility, Justice, Freedom and Liberty belong in the new language of Liberals! Progressives are notoriously bad at vocalizing our values (because we also value facts and logic). All of the issues we support are connected by the ethic of caring and empathy. Absolutely everything we care about is linked together through our values and the government must be responsible for protecting us and moving us toward a more just and equal society. That’s why Social Security is so important. That’s why gay rights are so important. That’s why all the issues we care about are so important. It’s because we care about our fellow citizens. We want the elderly, who can no longer work, to be taken care of and not out on the streets or in poverty!! They shouldn’t be subjected to the gambling done on the Wall Street Casino. Family stability and responsibility matter - not the sex of a parent. An education is a right not a reward for the rich. We need an educated society in order to maintain our democracy.
The only way to accomplish our goals is to COME TOGETHER. We must start pushing our values and stop pushing single issues. For example, instead of saying, “I believe in Global Warming,” we should say, “We need to make sure the environment continues to support us and our children. Corporations pollute our air and water and use our land – all for private profits. These corporations use MORE of our resources than individuals do, so it only makes sense for them to pay for polluting our planet and making us sick. We must curb the local and global destruction they inflict, etc. (then we would push our reps to sponsor Cap and Dividend legislation)… BUT the issues come last, not first. If we don’t explain our values, issues don’t get the support they need. Gays are fighting for same sex marriage. Feminist are fighting for women to be able to have control of their own bodies, and on and on, but we’re all connected by the ethic of caring and we must UNITE as such.
Most people are bi-conceptuals: they have both conservative and progressive views in different aspects of their lives (family, work, school, etc.) Conservatives are superb at manipulating language to get people to vote against their own interests. Progressives need to stimulate the more progressive side of everyone’s brain by talking about our VALUES! PROGRESSIVES UNITE!
“Big Money. No Humanity.” This message was painted into the sidewalk in Columbus, OH.
And it makes you ask, where is our humanity? Even if we know about all the pain, poverty, suffering, and discrimination experienced by others, do we care?
Do we really care when a black baby dies from malnutrition?
Do we really care when Mexican kids kill each other?
Do we really care when the rich exploit the poor for their labor?
Do we really care that women suffer abuse by their partners?
Do we really care that most people work in jobs they hate?
Do we really care if people die because they can’t get the health care they need?
If we do care, then what are we doing about it? Are we already too caught up in our own misery, lost in our own heads, too tired, lazy, or self-absorbed to work not only for a better America but for a better world? What could we do with the money we saved if we didn’t buy the next product shoved in our face, if we didn’t believe that owning things would make us happy, if we started objecting to living in our own houses separated from those we love by walls and miles - separated from our own humanity?
I think we could live free for the first time in our lives.
